dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Church boner. Awkwardddd
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize