um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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