Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
