Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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