She said her name was "party"
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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