on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
operation have a gay friend backfired
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.