I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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