So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Randomize