All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
