you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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