someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
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