we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
