i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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