they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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