I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
They took my balls.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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