It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize