i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
