Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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