well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
