yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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