end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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