lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
your room smells of hookers.
And success
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
