yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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