you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
