the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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