I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
