his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
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