Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
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