8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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