There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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