I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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