careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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