I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize