Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
he was CRYING into my vagina
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
