I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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