that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
