In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
