just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
