wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
