3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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