whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
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