I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize