Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
the condom got lost in my hair
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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