we have pet lesbian snakes
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
