I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
