I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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