I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
