apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Randomize
