Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
