Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
