its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
